An Abomination in the Sky

The Federal Communications Commission has proposed that airline passengers be permitted to make calls on their mobile telephones while in flight. Given that most people have a tiresome habit of speaking very loudly - often all but shouting - while on the telephone, your correspondent, who likes to sleep on airplanes, considers that the noise pollution will be close to intolerable.

If this airborne abomination comes to pass, your correspondent plans to travel with a roll of duct tape. Those within earshot who commit the annoyance of speaking loudly at their telephones, will shortly find a five inch piece of duct tape slapped over their mouths.

Duct tape, being cheap, will be distributed to all who would like to silence their neighbors too!

To be serious, your correspondent suspects that he will be one of many who becomes a former customer of any airline that is foolish enough to go along with this stupidity.